Stand Up for Marriage: Live the Sacrament!

There's been a lot of buzz recently since the Supreme Court heard two cases involving the question of whether or not same-sex unions or so-called same-sex marriage should be constitutionally protected. I haven't written one line about the debate on this blog since the cases were heard, mostly because I feel others have articulated the arguments for traditional marriage much better than I ever could.

One thing, that has struck me in all of this is the absence of discussion about our roles in being witnesses to the world of the sanctity of marriage. If those of us who are married (especially Catholics) would start living our marriages like the sacrament they are, we could change the world. LITERALLY. I honestly believe that is where the fight will be won, by being witnesses of our faith. In other words, this means by sanctifying our ordinary lives, we witness to the Gospel truth, announcing it to non-believers and fortifying the faith of believers (AA, 5). The Council of Vatican II spurred the laity to use their particular gifts “to explain, defend, and properly apply Christian principles to the problems of our era in accordance with the mind of the Church” (AA, 6).

Here's a video that cuts to the chase:

The Incarnation

Word Made Flesh, Nellie Edwards

What is the Incarnation?

The simple answer is Jesus is the Incarnation, the second person of the Holy Trinity. He is the Word made flesh (see John 1:14). The Incarnation describes “the union of the divine and human natures in the one divine Person of the Word.” (Compendium of the Catechism of the Catholic Church, #86).

When we recite the Nicene Creed, we profess our faith in Jesus Christ, “true God” and “one in being with Father.” “For us men and for our salvation he came down from heaven, by the power of the Holy Spirit, he was born of the Virgin Mary, and became man.” We are professing our belief that Jesus is fully human and fully God.

The Ultimate Sacrament

A sacrament is defined as a sensible sign, instituted by Jesus Christ, by which invisible grace and inward sanctification are communicated to the soul. Jesus is God made present among us – the ultimate grace made visible! Jesus is the ultimate sign of God’s salvation in the world – the center and means of God’s encounter with us. Thus, he is the original Sacrament.

The sacraments reflect this mystery in two ways first. All of the sacraments make use of visible matter to demonstrate an invisible grace. Additionally all of them pour out of Christ’s side. Each either initiates union with Him or confirms and solidifies that relationship. For example, Baptism initiates one into the Body of Christ and prepares one for eventual confirmation and reception of the Body and Blood of the Lord in the Sacrament of the Eucharist.

The Hidden Years of Christ

Of Jesus' thirty-three years, thirty were spent in silence and obscurity, submission and work. These hidden years are not a period of darkness, but rather illuminate for us the meaning of our own ordinary lives. He adds grace to our “hidden lives.” Everything Christ did was with meaning. Since He was perfect in every way, all of his actions had meaning. In this way, the Incarnation is not just about God humbling Himself to become man, but also about Him raising the nature of Man (See: Christ is Passing By #14, St. Josemaria Escriva).

This provides us with a framework to draw meaning from our own daily work, even the menial tasks. Like I've said before, this even includes taking out the trash or unloading the dish washer. This also includes the relationships we keep, like honoring our parents. (See: Luke 2: 51) It also means there is meaning and opportunities for sanctification in the way we maintain our friendships. Jesus had many friendships, but none better chronicled in scripture than that with the family of friends in Bethany - Lazarus, Martha and Mary (See: John 11:1-12:11)

Scripture also depicts how Christ's teaches us how to pray (Matt 6:6-15). Finally, His passion, death and resurrection demonstrate that God can and does permit suffering to draw out a greater good.

For More Study

Catechism of the Catholic Church - #456-483
EWTN - God Became Man
Father William Most, Jesus Christ, God and Man

Tuesday Tech Talk:Marriage, Annulments and Divorce

I don't profess to be an expert on the Church's annulment procedures, but I can speak from first-hand experience about how difficult the annulment process can be. Yesterday, Stacey and I celebrated the seventh anniversary of the day our marriage was officially convalidated by the Church. It is a special day for us, because it also marks the anniversary of Stacey's full admission into the Catholic Church; she received the sacraments of the Eucharist and Confirmation at our ceremony.

As I was reflecting on the years since we both came into full communion with the Church, it occurred to me that one of the biggest hurdles for people returning or staying in the Church are issues surrounding current and past marriages. All you have to do is listen to a session on Catholic Answers open lines to hear a majority of calls on marriage, annulments and divorce. I feel for these people because I know how much they want to conform to the teachings of the Church and how challenging it can be.

Some have criticized U.S. Catholics as using annulments as a form of Catholic sanctioned divorce. This may be the case with some, but I don't think the majority of people fall into this category. Instead, I believe many are the victims of years of poor catechises and inadequate marriage prep. I myself am a cradle Catholic. I didn't know until a deacon told me, although Stacey wasn't Catholic, that her previous marriage was an impediment to us getting married. Unfortunately, no one told me (and I didn't ask) that before we got married by the county. This of course complicated matters.

The Church leadership is taking strides to remedy some of this. The USCCB has recently developed For Your Marriage, dedicated to promoting marriage formation. This is important because marriage is not only a sacrament, but it is also a vocation for which one is called. The site is a comprehensive resource for those getting married, already married or getting married for the second time. It also includes resources on parenting, natural family planning and provides helpful tips for strengthening the marriage bond.

In a time when traditionally marriage is under attack, we need to begin by taking care of our own household. What I mean by that is how can anyone take us seriously when Catholics are divorcing at similar rates as non-Catholics? This is not any different than any other form of evangelization. Other people have got to see a difference in us. We need to stand out for our caring, loving and fortified marriages.

If you found this post helpful, you might also be interested in:

World Marriage Day

WMD & Marriage

Sometimes when Stacey and I have a knock down drag out fight (yes, loving couples in a sound marriage CAN and DO fight) it can seem like someone is about to launch a WMD.  The WMD I am referring to in the title of this post is World Marriage Day.  The idea for WMD originated in Baton Rouge, Louisiana 1981. A few couples in that area approached their mayor, governor and bishop about honoring marriage on St. Valentine's Day. The event was so successful it was eventually adopted by the World Marriage Encounter and expanded to several other states. In 1993, Blessed Pope John Paul II "imparted his Apostolic Blessing upon World Marriage Day." WMD is now celebrated throughout the United States on the second Sunday in February.

Last night our parish celebrated WMD with a "sweetheart" dance and dinner. The evening began with a blessing over the couples, followed by a series of prayer petitions for married couples. This morning at Mass, Father Mathew blessed all the married couples in attendance.

I like the idea of the WMD, but I have a small issue with their logo. While I agree that the two hearts should be one, there is one heart missing - the Sacred Heart of Jesus. The sacramentality of marriage - and ultimately its success - rests in the union with Christ. Archbishop Fulton Sheen wrote a book on this very subject entitled Three to Get Married (available in txt format on EWTN). Maybe I am being picky, but my point is that in a time when the sacrament of marriage is under attack, we should do all we can to promote its sacramentality.

Nevertheless, I think WMD is good start. It should be a launching point for developing more couples' oriented ministries within parishes. Our parish has a Couples' Ministry that meets once a month, revolving between homes of its members. The couples all gather for a potluck meal and then have organized discussions on various topics.

More Marriage Resources:

• The Alexander House
• Casti Connubii, Pope Pius XI
• World Marriage Encounter